It's Christmas and Am away from Home

It’s Christmas and I am in the continent of Africa – thousands of miles away from home.  I feel homesick and  longing for the familiar and the usual way of celebrating this day – the festivities, moments with family, relatives and friends, the exchanging and receiving of gifts, lots of food, etc. , etc.  Although in my heart, I know that these are not so significant on the true meaning of Christmas. 

with fellow Filipino volunteers at the big mall in Dar es Salaam

I am trying to fight the loneliness by reflecting the good and the bad things that I have and got during this year.  I believe that the good ones are blessings or maybe just pure luck.  The bad ones should be forgotten but they are meant to happen because they gave me lessons in life which shaping me to be a better person.

For all these things, I’m so thankful and glad to have the gift of life that the Creator gave me. 

I wish that my heart will be full of love, joy, forgiveness and peace this season and not loneliness or emptiness.  And I wish the same to all humanity.

May Santa fills this plastic bag with peace, joy, hope and love and be scattered around the world - not the plastic bag, only those inside.:-)

Have a blessed Christmas!

crossing the highways

Crossing a highway is one of my greatest hurdles.   It happened when I was 7 years old.  I was hit by a fast motorcycle while crossing a busy highway.  I’ve got some bruises and fortunately, there was nothing major physical damaged on me except the visible scar on my left eyebrow.  This accident gave me occasional nightmares in my childhood and adult life.

But I have to face this fear.  I can not avoid crossing highways.  They are everywhere. I have no other option but to fight back the anxieties that paralyzes me every time I cross them.     And when there is no one to cling unto, I have to be brave and believe in myself that I can do it. I have to because I need to or else I can be stuck forever beside the highway and I can never go to where I intend to go.    

one of the pedestrian lanes along the busy highway of Dar es Salaam

It’s like facing life even it is so uncertain.  I had shares of pains and some left deep scars on me emotionally but life should go on.   I have to be strong to live fully or else my existence would just be totally wasted.  I have to take risk even it might hurt me. It is the natural flow of life which means that this flow knows where to go and have its own way to reach its final destination.   Therefore, I have to follow and go with it.  And maybe, this is the ultimate method to find the true path of life.   


“Life isn't simple. But the beauty of it is, you can always start over. It'll get easier. “
Alacia Bessette, Simply from Scratch, 2010

carrot juice and old buildings

I know that there is no relevance between carrot juice and old buildings.  I just can’t think of a better title for this post. J

I went to the city center one time to look for rechargeable batteries for my camera.  It was early afternoon and the strong sun discouraged me to start roaming around so I decided to stay for a while at a place that looks like a mini-food court with 4 food stalls to choose from – oriental to western. I ordered a carrot juice from one of the food stalls and ended up having a huge glass (450 ml) that took me more than an hour to finish it ‘til the last drop. The counter-lady told me that no available size of carrots for the small size juice that day.  I did not get the logic from her answer but when I observed the preparations I understood what she meant.  The ratio is 1:1; 1 carrot for 1 glass juice.  So, size here matters; small carrot for small size juice or large carrot for large size juice. 

After my glass was totally empty, I left to search for electronic shops in the area.  I had the chance as well to take photos of the old buildings around.  They were engraved of the year they were built; from 1930s to 1940s.  I wonder if the city government is helping to preserve or rehabilitate these buildings.  I noticed that some are poorly maintained.  I am not aware of the Land Use Plan or Building Code of the City but the way I looked at it, these buildings are not taken care of (my presumption) very well.   But they are beautiful and I am sure that I am not the only one who have seen their attractiveness.


I hope that locals are giving importance to these historic sights.

 

"He who loves an old house never loves in vain."

Conant, Isabel La Howe

over a cup of cappuccino

It’s a month that I have not updated my blog.  My brain was preoccupied from work-related to personal, trivial and senseless things lately that hindered me to write something. 

Lately, it’s so frustrating that the more efforts I tried to organize my thoughts or be logical, the more my brain goes awry - senior moments or maybe, I am just thinking too much or not thinking at all?

While having a cup of cappuccino on my own at a coffee shop somewhere in the city, my inactive neurons tried to decipher these statements:
   

·    “I want to inform you that I am (mentioned his profession) so basically I know all these things.  It’s so complex that you cannot just teach people how to do it in very short time....” (statement)

Ø   I said aloud, “I am on the same field. I can follow what you are talking about.” But what was in my mind was this.  Who cares about your title or degree.  At the end of the day, what people remember about you is your character and the way you treat or deal with them. (response of my brain)

·    “I am charging ________ per day for the ___, the transportation and communication are not included yet.”

Ø   I should have told that person that we (volunteers) are receiving that amount every month as our allowance which covers everything – our food, utilities, transportation.  And we have no salary.

·    “That price is good enough, everything is so expensive now and prices of goods are keep on increasing...blah..blah”

Ø   I said aloud.  “I understand.” What’s in my brain was this.  I can be emphatic with you and I can understand you if you belong to the marginalize group or if you are poor.  But you are not.

·    Well, maybe you can find a lower service fee than mine but not the same quality that I can deliver.

Ø    I did not utter a word.  But maybe this person is not aware about the principles of healthy competition. And, he should know a better way to promote his competencies.

·    “I am sincere to help.”

Ø    I have no idea if this person is convincing me or convincing himself.



a cup of cappuccino makes me awake the whole day

Well, life is pathetic sometimes.  I think it is so human to be selfish at certain level that becomes acceptable or can be justified. I cannot define what level is acceptable or unacceptable.  Or what and how much is enough not to be greedy and when and how to know to stop wanting more.

I finished my cappuccino without noticing it.  It was time for me to go.  I left at the shop whatever bad thoughts I had in my brain. I hope no one would catch them. 

“Greed is a bottomless pit which exhausts the person in an endless effort to satisfy the need without ever reaching satisfaction."  Erich Fromm

Amid the Inequalities of Gender in Tanzania

In Tanzania, the inequalities of women and men still persist politically, socially and economically.  And this is common in developing countries.  As per report of World Bank; women in the developing world have made strides in education, but still lag far behind men in opportunities, a gender gap that is hampering growth.  In many areas (developing countries), girls and women continue to suffer discrimination that keeps them second-class citizens economically and socially, and even in health. 

a Massai woman in Handeni District

In Tanzania, 60% of women live in absolute poverty.  Below are some facts about women in this country (source:  Tanzania Poverty and Human Development Report, 2009).

·         Women are deprived of education and information.  In 2008, the population aged 15-49 years; 19.1% of women had no formal education, while only 9.5% for men.  In the post secondary education; only 32.1% of women were enrolled in the colleges and universities. 

·         Low participation in the Labor Market. Unemployment rate for female was higher; which is 15.4% compare to men which is 14.3%.  Only 24.7% of women were paid employees on the labor supply.  

·         Over 60% of people living with HIV are women.

Although, their government is putting efforts to mainstream gender in all their development initiatives and activities, their customary laws and traditions limit the full development of the potentials of their women.  Like in tribal communities, they won’t allow women to have property – such as owning a land or cattle for farming. 

A woman in Handeni District carrying a bucket of water for her family

It’s good to know that the Government of Tanzania has passed several laws in favour of women i.e. Sexual Offences Special Provisions Act of 1998, the Land Law Act of 1999 and Village Land Act of 1999. The first Law protects women, girls and children from sexual harassment and abuse. The last two laws repeal and replace previous legislations on land matters thus enabling women to enjoy equal rights with men in access, ownership and control of land (http://www.tanzania.go.tz/gender.html).

Despite of the inequities, there are women in Tanzania who works hard on their own to break this gap and through their initiative; they have started to build their life in order to be productive economically and socially, thus, to eradicate poverty in their families and community. 

Recently, I made a report about groups of women in the community where my organization is serving.  The meetings and interviews were in Kiswahili but the results were translated to English by my colleague.  Their stories were inspiring and they gained my respect and admiration.

during the documentation process of my report

These women lack education but this did not stop them to dream of improving the lives of their families and their children.  Out of 45 women we documented, 33 of them had primary education and 12 had secondary.  But through their own choice, they are now in the process of transforming themselves to be self-sufficient and self-reliant.   Their livelihood makes them earn USD 1 to 2 a day but they continue to work hard to be totally free from poverty.

Basilica Kimaro, 29, married with 2 children, earns at least USD 822.00/year from her farm

 

Alphocina, 28, married with 3 children, earns at least USD 576/year from her farm

IIIII

*and me - a lucky woman to be from one of the countries that offer women the most expansive rights and the best quality of life (Philippines is one of the Top 20 countries with the rank of 17th <out of 165 countries> as the best place for women)

*the picture was taken in Macau last July 2010

A woman is the full circle.
Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform.

~ Diane Mariechild ~

USD 100 for a piece of junk

When I moved to my 3^rd house (posted about this last June I think), the Program Office agreed that I can purchase a second hand (or used or not brand new) fridge which the amount has to be deducted from the monthly rentals that my organization (employer) have to pay.

After some delays and postponements, I was able to buy one with the help of Joven (the full-time Admin. Staff from my organization).  The budget that I can spend is TSH 150,000 (around USD 100.00).

We went to the areas where most of the shops sell used electronic appliances.  According to the shop owner where we bought my fridge, his items are from UK and Hong Kong.  During our brief chat, he mentioned that he travels to Hong Kong to buy used electronic items.  When I asked him if he is making a profit, he said that it is a good business (after I’ve heard him telling Joven that he earns so little that’s why he can’t give the price we were asking). 

With USD 100, I’ve got a fridge that literally looks like a junk but it’s still working.  Though, I have no idea, how long it will last.

this piece of junk is USD 100

The LDCs (Less Developed Countries) are the junk yards or dumping sites of industrialized countries.  It is an abusive practice of “free trade”.  They (industrialized countries) are concealing the fact that they are dumping their waste or unmanageable accumulation of possible hazardous materials to the poor countries by claiming it as a “donation” to poor people who has no capacity to buy new electronic equipment.

Aside from the burdens of the poor countries financially, politically, socially and ecologically, they also suffer from the adverse effects of this “free trade”.  The electronic waste would lead to contamination of the environment specifically the water and land which putting the poorest population of the world at great risk.  How pathetic  it is to be poor? :-(

E-waste (Electronic Waste) is routinely exported by developed countries to developing ones, often in violation of the international law. Inspections of 18 European seaports in 2005 found as much as 47 percent of waste destined for export, including e-waste, was illegal. In the UK alone, at least 23,000 metric tonnes of undeclared or 'grey' market electronic waste was illegally shipped in 2003 to the Far East, India, Africa and China. In the US, it is estimated that 50-80 percent of the waste collected for recycling is being exported in this way. This practice is legal because the US has not ratified the Basel Convention (www.greenpeace.org).

The Basel Convention on the Control of Transboundary Movements of Hazardous Wastes and Their Disposal, usually known simply as the Basel Convention (Basel, Switzerland), is an international treaty that was designed to reduce the movements of hazardous waste between nations, and specifically to prevent transfer of hazardous waste from developed to LDC). It does not, however, address the movement of radioactive waste. The Convention is also intended to minimize the amount and toxicity of wastes generated, to ensure their environmentally sound management as closely as possible to the source of generation, and to assist LDCs in environmentally sound management of the hazardous and other wastes they generate  (source: Wikipedia; please see www.basel.int for more information).

being an outsider

After living in Tanzania for more than 6 months, there are several occasions that I’ve felt bad and good of being an outsider.  I have love and hate relationship with this country.  Nevertheless, it continuously shapes me to grow and be a better (I think) person.

There are things in Tanzania that I am connected with since these are somewhat related to my culture.

the symbol made by Filipinos that considered Tanzania as their second home - on the logo are the flags and national parks of Tanzania and Philippines

·         Both are developing countries.  However, Philippines have higher GDP per capita with USD 3,700+; PPP (purchasing power parity) compare from Tanzania with only USD 1,400.

·         Complaining about the corrupt officials.  When you talk to locals, they put the blame on the corruptions of their government officials on the slow progress of their country.  In the Philippines, you can hear the same comment from the people and this is openly discusses from the media.

·         Hardworking.  Doing manual work by their hands under the fierce sun (like digging on their farms or  beside the road, carrying blocks at construction sites, cleaning ducts, etc.), peddling, carrying heavy bulks of goods on their heads or using bicycle, etc. 

·         Kinship.   Family members support each other like giving financial help to members who are in-need.  This is also common in my country.  It is typical to accommodate relatives (up to 3^rd or 4^th degree cousins or as long as there is a blood relations) at home. 

·         Politeness of people and giving respect to elders.  They greet anyone regardless if they are strangers or friends.  Young people never fail to greet me “shikamo” (an Arabic greeting to senior people J ).  In my country, we use “po” if we are talking to our seniors – by age or job position;  e.g. Kumusta po kayo? – How are you?.  I also observed at public buses that children offer their seats to elders which are also common in my country. 

·         Complaining about the traffic jam (but everybody does regardless of any culture).   

·         Eating lots of rice. Tanzanian loves to eat rice aside from Ugale (maize porridge).  We have no ugale in the Philippines but it is common among Filipinos to eat rice 3x a day – from breakfast to dinner. 

·         Using spoon or hand during meals.  It is common in Tanzania and in the Philippines to use spoon while eating their rice meal or just bare hands while having meal.                                                                              

·         Happy go lucky.  Poor people know how to enjoy their life.  They don’t complain but they work hard and strive.  Filipinos have the same attitude.  Both love to laugh and not to take life so seriously. 

Although I am struggling with the Kiswahili language, with smiles and physical gestures I know that there is a connection between Tanzania and my country.

my hand with the hand of my little Tanzanian friend

My limits have been tested many times while living here but I still feel lucky to have the opportunity to appreciate others' culture aside from my own.  I’ve got a lot to learn and in the end of my journey to Tanzania – I can say that it’s indeed a worthwhile experience.

had an opportunity to revisit our National Heroe's Park (Rizal Park) after more than 20+ years last December 2009 with friends

dreaming of spending a day at the beach of Dar

Last week, a colleague mentioned that there is a nice beach in the northern part of Dar.  The place is called Mbezi.  I googled it since I was thinking of going there on the weekend (Sunday). I’ve found a review that says it is one of the best beaches in Dar but it is not advisable to explore alone because of some cases of mugging. 

watching the sunset, philippines, summer 2010

I was anticipating getting a positive reply from my SMS asking if this colleague is free on Sunday.  Well, I did not get a response.  I searched again the internet hoping that I can find a place in the area that is safe.  I found a site that says there are resorts with security but there’s an advice to be cautious when getting a ride from the main road going to these resorts because of past incidenced of mugging (also).  I was arguing with myself if I am confident to go on my own.  I was apprehensive but I am eager to go.   Anyway, I have one day to decide so I stopped bugging my mind. 

catching the sun, philippines, summer 2010

On the next day, I decided that I will go.  But later in the afternoon, I suffered stomach cramps and migraine. I went to bed early and woke up very late unintentionally.
 

special treat to myself

My weekend did not happen the way as planned - walking on the shore and watch the sunset at Mbezi beach.  What I did was cooked for myself a good food and watched Korean drama instead. It was not a bad weekend afterall. J

Christmas Time

After my work last Thursday, I went straight to the big mall.  I did not realize that it was still the celebration of Eid.  The crowd was a bit huge compare from the ordinary days.  Everybody who was there was in a festive mood.  The booth for face painting was crowded of children.  There were also displays of colourful balloons and toys.  I suddenly felt homesick.  September is the beginning of the celebration of Christmas in the Philippines.  As early as September, Christmas songs and carols are on the air and Christmas decors, trees and lights are already visible although it’s still four months away from the actual celebration of Christmas Day or the birth of Jesus Christ. 

This month, Filipinos start to spend heavily on shopping - for exchange gifts or something to prepare on the day of Christmas.  During this season, regardless of their income status (either rich or poor), everyone is equal.  The Christmas day should always be exceptional.  For rich families - it's  lavish gifts and sumptous food.  Foor poor families - modest or simple preparations, yet, still special.

What I miss  will be the bonding moments wth the people who are close to my heart.  Christmas is the time to get together and primarily a family affair which should be exclusively reserve to share love, joy and peace with them.

Well, I hope that my fellow Filipinos will not forget the true essence of Christmas.  Not the gift we give or receive on  Christmas day that makes it very special – it is this day that God sent us the redeemer; Jesus Christ.  It’s the reason why we (Christians) celebrate it <80% of the 95M+ population of the Philippines are Christians>.

beside a huge Christmas tree during the Ret. Vol.'s Wekend; Nov. 2009, Philippines - I was wearing a Saree - a traditional dress of Bangladeshi Women

I should not be lonely on Christmas even if I am away from my loved ones.  Since I will be saved from hectic never ending shopping of Christmas gifts ; I should prepare myself instead on how to share the true spirit of Christmas with the people who are with me now - the joy of giving.

And I look forward to witness and experience how Tanzania celebrates Christmas.

Understanding Culture

Prelude Notes:  I wrote this post yesterday but I was too lazy to upload it.  This afternoon, we had a meeting with our Executive Director and he mentioned things that are related to the culture of Tanzania that maybe not acceptable to foreigners (like me). I wonder if he can read minds. LOL. And I was embarrassed when he said that he reads my blog.  Now, I should be careful ;-) <joke>.

It is imperative that living in a place not in your own country is to blend with the culture of its people.  It’s interesting to learn new culture (including the language but not applicable to me) but there are times that I get frustrated.  These are some that I have experience and observed:

·         Being laid back is synonymous to “no sense of urgency”.  Even the meeting is sets at 9:00 A.M., expect that no one arrives on time.  They always presume that everyone understands this – being late is a “culture thing.”

·         It’s very common here to hear habari (how are you), asante (thank you), karibu (welcome) and pole (sorry) from locals but there are some that when they bump on you or step on your foot accidentally, you can’t hear anything – an apology or sorry.  For them, this is acceptable because maybe it is accidental or unintentional. Or maybe they are too shy to apologize.

·         Shouting Dada (sister) or Kaka (brother) at the waitresses or waiters in a restaurant when getting their attention is not rude even without saying “Excuse me”. 

·         When you order a food at a restaurant; if the server says that you have to wait for 10-15 minutes, that will be an hour.

with fellow volunteers - finally, we got out first batch of pizza <we had 3 or 4 :-)>

at a fancy restaurant while waiting patiently for my order (I have to save at least 2 days of my allowance so that I can eat here)

·         When you ask for a direction (on foot), if they say Iko Karibu (just nearby) maybe that’s still 5 or 10 km away.

·         Shouting at each other or arguing in loud voices at public places is just normal.  They don’t care if they are getting attention from others (or it could be that I am the only one that is distracted from this).

The good thing is that, I have learned to assimilate all of these.  Besides, I realized that I should be the one to adjust.  Not them – it’s their country anyway.



“Those who know nothing of foreign languages know nothing of their own.”
        Johann Wolfgang von Goethe quotes (German Playwright, Poet, Novelist and Dramatist. 1749-1832)

Unafanya Kazi? (What is your work?) Wapi? (Where?)

have to travel 2 hours including traffic to my work

My life in Tanzania (I am referring to Dar es Salaam) is spends mostly commuting in the city from my house to work through the ubiquitous dala-dala.  Fellow passengers who cannot contain by themselves of their curiosity on me always ask  - Unafanya Kazi? (What is your work?) Wapi? (Where? ) With my struggling Kiswahili, I try to explain that I am working as a volunteer and assigned to a local NGO somewhere in one of the suburb areas of Dar es Salaam.   

after 2 hours of travel, have to take this short cut to get another dala-dala ride (below)

have to walk few meters before reaching the office

the office where I work

*these children always give me a company at the office while waiting for the others 

With the frequency that I encounter these questions, I have started reflecting on the significance of my life as a volunteer in Tanzania.  I did not come to seek adventure but to find a deeper meaning of my life and to make something that will touch other people’s lives  It’s almost 6 months now that I am here.

A peddler who works hard for his family

I think I have done so little that may change or give impact to the lives of the poor people.  What is happening now is the opposite.  I am the one that is on the process of being transformed because of what I am learning from them.  

Despite of my complaints of discomforts, these are compensated of many lessons about life that will be forever planted in my heart.  Everyday, I try to put efforts to be a better person, be humane, more wiser and be more appreciative of what I have.

* their parents want them to have good education

community work  under my umbrella.  not raining. can't stand the heat of the sun

By the time that I leave this country, I might not have delivered the technical skill that is expected of me but for the poor people, being with them for a while just listening about their stories on their hardships is enough for them to feel that there are people in the world who care for them.

her backyard garden is the major source of their family income

with the community

* consent was given by the guardians and parents of these children to be on these  pictures